That is Just How Life Works

Last Monday, we had a grab-a-date. By 11am, I still had not asked anyone, because I was expecting to be set up by an older girl. Being the cougar that I am, I asked Brent, a first year who went to my high school. This was a strategic move on my part because I figured that I wouldn't be expected to hook up with him.

"I'd be honored," he responded, "Can you text me the details?"

We exchanged numbers, and I felt relieved to have an attractive, funny, friend-date for the night. 

After our Monday night meeting, I rushed home to stuff my face with anything that I could call dinner. A wizard in multitasking, I took a shower while cooking some veggies and quinoa, then whipped up some eggs. I think it took me about ten minutes to eat (that is monumentally fast for me, mind you). 

I blow-dried my hair, then put on a tight B&W polka dot dress. Just to be prepared, I put on a brand-new lace thong, also because it made me feel extra hot. I biked over to a pregame that one of the juniors put together for girls who had dates in our brother frat. Thankfully, a few of my friends were also pre gaming there, so I was bound to have fun. 

I thought that I showed up casually late (Brent got there at 8:05pm and I was five-ten minutes behind) as people were originally supposed to get there around 8. Embarrassingly, the time was changed to 8:25 (unbeknownst to me), so I watched football upstairs with some of the guys while I waited for everyone else. 

Once the group of girls walked over from the house (where they were pregaming the pregame), I joined them downstairs. Classics, like "Build Me Up Buttercup," were blasting while handles of Kirkland vodka were passed around. Originally, I had not planned on drinking very much, but realized that I was actually having a ton of fun. 

Only if I deem that it is "worth it," will I drink. This was one of those times. A few handle pulls with my date and our friends later, everyone was walking to our oceanside destination. I was definitely tipsy, borderline drunk. Thankfully, I was not sloppy and held my own in my heels. 

After talking on the back deck for at least an hour, Brent asked, "Wanna head over to our senior house? I think there are a bunch of people over there."

As soon as we walked in, Rhett quickly approached us, "Hey! A bunch of us are going skinny dipping--"

Turning to Brent, I exclaimed, "We have to go!" Then repeated my excitement to Rhett. Skinny dipping in the ocean is probably one of my absolute favorite things in the world, as I love to float, listening to the sand brush against itself and sway with the waves. About ten of us stripped ourselves and ran into the sea. If I weren't drunk, I might have felt a bit reserved at first, but I was the first one to rip everything off Monday night. 

We all swam for a while, until we felt the bite of the chilly water (it still isn't cold, but the breeze and lack of sun did not make it warm). Heading back to the boys' chapter house, we hung out for a while. People began clearing out, and I thanked Brent for a great time. 

"Sooo... I actually wanted to hook up with him by the end," I admitted to Jordan the next morning.

"Well did you?" She asked. 

"No! My predictions were right, I don't think he was going to make a move. Anyways, I think it was the alcohol. The drunker I got, the hotter he became."

"Wow," she remarked, sarcastically, "I've never heard of that happening before."

Since I haven't been that drunk in a really, really long time, I kind of forgot how that usually progresses for me...

Relaxing most of the week, Thursday and Friday got busy really fast. 

After my physics midterm on Thursday (which I aced by the way, you should be proud), Maya, Sam, and I jumped in the ocean. Which reminds me: I go to the best school in the world.

When I got home, I threw on some hot pink spandex and headed over to the house to prepare for our dodgeball tournament. I opted to play for the team because I really wanted to vent my feelings in a healthy way by making some bitches take balls to the face. We had some fun matches, but our team kicked ass (expectedly), leading us to win the dodgeball tourney! 

Friday morning, I woke up insanely early to cram for my Organic Chemistry midterm at 2pm. I don't think I did too hot on the test, but I did way better than I could have going in blind. Ideally, I would have stayed up Thursday night, but even a tall cup of coffee couldn't keep my eyes open. 

In the afternoon, I rode the train home for the weekend. After a relaxing Saturday with my family (I also got a new phone finally!!), Sunday came along with an early morning. At around 5am, my parents and I drove to San Diego for my surf competition. The conditions ended up being pretty terrible, so I didn't advance as far as I wanted to. 

Since I needed to somehow find a way back up to Santa Barbara, I asked Mikey, one of the guys on our team for a ride with him and Quincy. 

I now realize that a lot of my crush on Mikey (plot twist?) could be explained by heaps of frustration with Kevin. You'd think that I would have seen him during my visit home, but he went camping. Which I don't care that he did, but it is irritating nonetheless to feel like you put so much more into something than someone else does. 

So basically, I have a mini-crush on Mikey because:
1. he is a cute surfer boy
2. he is really nice (my downfall)
3. I need a fatal distraction

The problem is, Stephanie has a huge crush on Mikey too, and she gets very territorial with guys. It's almost as if she insinuates dibs on any guy that she's remotely interested in, which isn't intimidating to me but it is definitely irritating. So, as soon as she found out that I was riding with him, she asked him for a lift (even though she already had one) so that she could stay longer. 

Honestly, there's probably less than a ten percent chance that Mikey would go for me, and even less than that for Steph (she's made it clear to him that she's thirsty, yet he hasn't picked up any of it). 

Just us walking to his car, "I think you have a TG with our house soon-- water polo and volleyball," he brought up, "And friends."

With a smile on his face, that obviously meant that he would be there. But, I am going to casually assume that he meant we could kick back and hang out, because who am I kidding, why would he even attempt to go for a second year such as myself. 

Regardless of whether or not it would ever even pan out (knowing my luck, it probably will not), this little schoolgirl crush is going to make things easier for me with Kevin. At this point, I kind of want to just run away before I get hurt. Hopefully, if I chase after something else, I'll end up somewhere where I forget about where I ran from or what I was running towards. My biggest fear is that I settle for something comfortable that doesn't drive my wild, so I just need to keep pushing forward even if it is difficult. I know that I'll probably end up feeling lost at some point, but I guess that can be nice from time to time. Then, something will eventually scoop me up and I'll start the whole process over again because that is just how life works.